Ross is love.

On the stick.

I recognize that "silly signs at the Asian buffet" is a fairly well-trod genre, but I tread there, even still. I also recognize that eating at such a place is is likely to shave several moments off of one's life, but when traveling and in the presence of relatives who know no better, one eats where one must. If you'd care to visualize said Meat Ball on the Stick, it appeared to be some sort of mushed seafood concoction wrapped in bacon. No sticks were in evidence, so there was likely some manner of translation error.

Itty bitty delights.

The lovely and talented Miss Sarah Smart once again shows all the boys her itty bitty...Cheeseburgers?  I like that it appears as though you get...what? 12 in that box? I also like the tasteful, minimalist logo. I'm less fond of the impending diarrhea.

Not sure if this qualifies as a food stuffed inside another food by virtue of the buns, or if we've moved into the more general but equally satisfying category of "questionable foods". Let's go with that.

More stuff inside other stuff that you could eat if you cared to.

Yesterday, the readers of Rosserford.com made "Picture of Mike holding weird, stuffed, mass-produced food item" the. single. most. popular. post. In Rosserford history. I shit you not. You either love Mike, or you love sausage. I'm not here to judge.

Because I find putting cream cheese on my bagel so terribly tiresome. If only there were a factory somewhere that could jam the cream cheese into the bagel before it ever gets to me...

Meet Rick. Our new spokesmodel for things with cream stuffed inside, that could only be improved by having a stick shoved through them.

Things that I don't know that I've ever been drunk enough to crave.

Jesus Christ. They've got them in the grocery store, too. Just...smaller...

My thanks to Mike, our new official spokesmodel for any food products that come wrapped in other food products and are available in an "on a stick" variety.

Wal-Mart after midnight.

Let my night be a cautionary tale unto you. I've seen things that no man should ever have to see.